I now know that the darker places in life are an invitation to growth and not the threat they appear to be when you first fall into them. Nobody told me that when I found myself there, so I wanted to let you know so you could see some light at the end of the tunnel. I had to figure it out largely by braille although there were lots of helpful people along the way. I’m happy to say I’ve emerged on the other side more satisfied with my life and work than I’ve ever been and clearer about who and how I want to be in the world. I'm clear about my purpose and I understand where my key growing edge is. I learned a lot in the process that I think will help others go through it with more clarity, confidence, coherence, and speed.
I'd done all the things I thought I needed to do to move ahead - I'd gotten my MBA from Wharton and a Masters in International Affairs from Johns Hopkins. I'd gotten a good job where I had interesting work and collaborative colleagues. I had a loving husband and wonderful daughter along with good friends, a beautiful house, and a healthy bank account. But inside, I was pretty miserable and my body was letting me know that things weren't really working for me.
I remember vividly the day and place where I realized I couldn't keep going this way or things would get a lot works, which felt scary. I knew about the black hole I could fall through. I really felt that I was the one at risk of taking myself there. I was also the one standing in the way of appreciating and enjoying my life. I realized then that it wasn't about changing something "out there" but somehow about changing something in here... I also recognized that I'd need help - because if I knew what to do, I'd already have done it.
The Way Out
Those two realizations - that I needed to change me and that I couldn't do it on my own - created the key turning point for me. From there I started a journey that brought me to a life that I love with gratitude for all the people and things that enrich my life. It led me to get yet another masters to learn about emotions and proceed to train as an executive coach to learn about fostering growth - in myself and others. Along the way, I also because fascinated with neuro-biology and learned about the role of the nervous system. I further grounded myself in an understanding of Strengths - both their contributions and their shadow sides. I've explored what fosters connect and what gets in the way.
Somewhere through the process, I had experiences of an inner wisdom that can best serve as a guide. In my subsequent work with my clients, I've learned how to help them tap that wisdom and awareness, which I've come to trust implicitly as knowing much more than we know cognitively. I belief that too much of the world is guided by ego and enough enough from a wiser place. I think if we could lead from wisdom, our lives and world would be so much better. So, that's me and why I'm so passionate about helping people understand their Strengths and tap into their Wisdom.
As I look back over my process and extract some themes and general areas for focus, they break down for me into 3 main areas and 9 elements.
Set Your Course:
- Stoke Your Motivation
- Take Ownership
- Clarify Purpose and Values
Mobilize Your Team to Assist:
- Find Support
- Befriend Self
- Recraft Relations with Important Others
Gain Insight and then Skillfulness:
- Understand Your Strengths
- Manage Stress and Your Nervous System
- Lead Your Inner Team
Exactly what these look like for you will be unique to you, but exploring these areas with concentrated focus aligns you with your Inner Leadership. Cultivating them is a lifelong endeavor and one I’m inspired to work toward. If you’d like to explore whether working together would be a good next step on the journey you wish to take, schedule a Inner Compass Call today.